Training log? More like confessional booth.
I struggle at times with body acceptance. Really badly when I'm bad, then totally proud and borderline mega vanity at other times. I run the full gambit of harshe self judgement over the arc of a month. Fkn hormones.
I was a bigger girl all through my twenties. My walking weight was 25kg larger than I am now. On average I was 86kg. At my largest I was an impressive 103kg.
Even though I've maintained 62-65 generally for about 8 years now, I am still that bigger girl in so many parts of my brain.
So now when I gain 2kg randomly, depending on the hormonal timing I either
a) think I'm a lifting beast and that I own ALL the muscle and I'm pretty much a super hero OR
b) think I'm pretty much a glutenous whale and should probably just give up on everything. Even phone calls. Too fat. Can't talk.
So was last week.
I lifted fine but then got a flu or something special that saw me not train for 4 days. I also puffed up like a water balloon and cried a fair bit for no reason. Hormones.
Soooooo what happened this week? The flu lifted and I was like an inmate being released. I've trained 2-3 times a day since. Hahahaha. Balance? What is this balance you speak of?!
I must make up for ALL the training ever missed of all time. And must do it now!
So this week has been tabata training each morning. I even roped in a friend and tortured her with my mania. Thanks Dan N.
Solid 5-10 minutes of warm up followed by 5x tabata rounds with one minute in between each.
I like to stick to the same movement throughout one full tabata round.
I also lean toward structuring my 5 tabatas as follows:
These were all done at 8am with night training being solely BJJ for 3 hours per night. One Gi session. One no Gi session. 90 mins each.
The idea of the tabatas being that I don't feel them the next day but aiming to get really breathing hard throughout.
In the first day I lost that excess weight that almost broke my soul last week. Hormones and water got me confused and self loathing. I wonder if I'll ever stop being so damn sensitive....
Now I'm lower than comp day weight, looking crazy lean in the upper body and looking forward to being photographed next weekend by BlackBoxPhotography!
Bring it. x.
I love hearing these popular comments on a regular basis:
Its different for you because you work at a gym so you get to train all the time.
Its different for you because you don’t have kids.
Its different for you because *insert any assumption you like here*.
So for 6 weeks now I’ve been working my full time 9 to 5 job, covering for a staff member that left that was also full time, re-writing our entire front of house procedure, recruiting new staff & training said new staff. All while trying to find energy and much harder still, time to train & prepare for competition.
But its different for me…
So yeah, last week I had a whopping FOUR opportunities to train for 60mins a pop to cover all my competition preparation, both lifting and grappling. In the end I also managed to drag myself to competition class for grappling on Saturday for 2 hours.
Man. Talk about fatigue.
Since we last spoke, I’ve worked the hours of 2 full time staff, ran 3 grappling competitions (in my spare? time) and tried my best to continue to train at a standard that is required for competition.
Here’s what I did on one of the days as an example of short and painfully draining work.
When time is limited, things get fast and hard.
Kettle Bell swings:
15 x 24kg every minute on the minute for 10mins.
Then 5 rounds of:
64kg farmers walk – 50meters
16kg Turkish get up – 1 each side
Then 3x10min rounds with my coach grappling, only seeking the new guard I’ve been playing with.
The above made me feel super nauseous and emotional for the rest of the day.
Not enough water throughout the workout & I didn’t eat soon enough after the session.
I prefer lifting a shit load of weight over a long time rather than smaller weights fast.
Have food immediately even when feeling nauseous. It will help with recovery.
Can’t wait to get back into my usual routine.
Excited to try new guard work for the upcoming competition but would love to have more time on the mats to work on it.
Here's what I did yesterday as day one of prep for the Pan Pacific Championships in October
50m Lunges with 40kg on the bar
10x fast up 60kg box squats
10x push ups
5 a side, kettle bell clean and strict press 14kg
3x alternating chin and slow toes to bar
50m body weight farmers walk
All to the Soundtrack of In-Flames
The farmers walks are gonna make me monster with grips and that is the goal of this phase.
I'm not a lifter but I'm in love with lifting. I train strength in support of my sport, which is Brazilian Jiu Jitsu. I'm bloody strong, and known for it amongst the girls in our competitive community.
Like lifting, BJJ is a male dominated sport. But unlike lifting, my 'weights' are not made of relentless and unforgiving iron, they're made of 90kg sweaty dudes in pyjamas trying to throw me, choke me, break my arms etc etc. At 62kg you either get strong or you get broken.
After a major LCL injury at competition that laid me off for 3 months of training, I was taught to deadlift. That was my rehab goal. To get to straight legged deads at the 12 week mark. It was the 'Summer of Guns' and I chin up-ed my way through 12 long weeks of rehab and stair step ups in a hip to ankle brace.
When I was finally able to deadlift I couldn't be happier. That's when the love of lifting began.
By the end of my rehab I was lifting 5x5s of 100kg daily. And about 50 chins daily. Yep. Daily. Obsessive much? I'm not saying that's a balanced or proper program but it's all I could do. So I did it. A lot. My cardio was rope work. And push ups (because I used to hold my breath throughout push ups so it became intense. Hahaha. Not on purpose).
I lost weight. And I got strong. Who knew you could do that without running that you haaaaate?! Hahaha yes! A fkn revelation and freedom from so many wrong ideas I had about training. Especially for aesthetic goals.
After I was given the all clear to train BJJ again, my first competition back at high level for wrestling was about 2 weeks later and wasn't exactly a quality display of BJJ technique. It was me kinda dead lifting chicks. And hard. It wasn't pretty. I won yeah. But I think purely by brute hulk anger. The girls wanted nothing of it. I can understand that.
Since then I've used deads, squats, push ups and chins almost daily as a way to stay strong enough to to continue to be injury free. Since starting to lift 2 summers ago Im happy to say that I've had an unprecedented run injury free. It's rare in our sport and very very high priority for me.
I usually work basic lifting movements after each of my 3 hour BJJ training sessions (I do 3 of these as 'heavy days' per week and 2 lighter 90 minute sessions per week). Heavy days include 3x5s of deads and squats at about 75% of max. All done relatively fast but with good rest in between. Plus 10 push ups and 5 chins between lifts. The idea being that if I do a little each day it accumulates over time. And that I don't feel these lifts as fatigue the next day.
When I'm in 'building strength' phase I structure my week better. And it's harder. Especially with DOMS.
3x 1 hour dedicated hard S&C classes so that I hit my BJJ classes afterwards fatigued. And less BJJ overall (which is actually cardio and KILLS my gains).
This structure means the technical aspect is all I'm able to really apply during BJJ classes though and though I feel worse at my sport when tired and can't win, I'm actually fine tuning the problem areas, which is kinda the point. It's an emotional time. I usually cry. It feels like I can't do anything right. But it's for a reason and yields good results.
So what's happening now?
Now I have a big comp in 5 weeks. I've been strength building for 3 months so now it's time for a switch it up. Now I have to lift sports specific. Get more functional with my movement.
I've been really unbalanced with my strength and my lifts during this last strengthening phase, which I'm not happy about. At 62kg, currently my squat is 70kg for 5x5s and my dead is 100kg for 5x5s and though I lifted an ugly double body weight dead last week (yay me, poor technique though), I can't even imagine breaking 100kg for my squat. After competition season I desperately want to fix that gap. And fix my technique. I know the bar is waaaaaay too far away from my legs in my dead. It needs work. It looks and feels shit. But I can't fix that now with my BJJ comp coming up.
So what's the plan?
I'm gonna smash some stuff to get me more explosive with posterior chain firing. And get killer grips.
So it begins. Again.